Defense Poem (Due Friday, March 16th!)

Read "The Iceberg Theory" by Gerald Locklin below.  Then, write a 10-line poem in defense of something you care about.  Perhaps you want to defend soccer in a football-centric culture. You could defend asparagus to a friend who thinks it's gross.  Maybe you want to defend an artist or athlete who others criticize.  Follow "The Iceberg Theory" formula by writing at least 5 lines that address or outline the critics' complaints and at least 5 lines that defend your subject!

The Iceberg Theory

all the food critics hate iceberg lettuce.
you'd think romaine was descended from
orpheus's laurel wreath,
you'd think raw spinach had all the nutritional
benefits attributed to it by popeye,
not to mention aesthetic subtleties worthy of
veriaine and debussy.
they'll even salivate over chopped red cabbage
just to disparage poor old mr. iceberg lettuce.

I guess the problem is
it's just too common for them.
It doesn't matter that it tastes good,
has a satisfying crunchy texture,
holds its freshness
and has crevices for the dressing,
whereas the darker, leafier varieties
are often bitter, gritty, and flat.
It just isn't different enough and
it's too gosh darn american.

of course a critic has to criticize;
a critic has to have something to say
perhaps that's why literary critics
purport to find interesting
so much contemporary poetry
that just bores the crap out of me.

at any rate, I really enjoy a salad
with plenty of chunky iceberg lettuce,
the more the merrier,
drenched in an Italian or roquefort dressing.
and the poems I enjoy are those I don't have
to pretend that I'm enjoying.